Coverage of me and other train wrecks: my mama, subway nut jobs, sex and the environment.



Tens of thousands of monks have been silenced by the junta's soldiers in Myanmar (formerly known as Burma). Soldiers locked some monks in their monasteries, imprisoned others, and beat or killed an unknown number. The monks gave moral, spiritual weight to the people's uprising. After a week of peaceful protests, the junta sent in the machine guns. What's a mob of civilians and unarmed monks to do? Many chose to die for their right to protest peacefully.

Thus far Bush's plan involves economic sanctions againt the junta leaders, and this is what pisses me off. Didn't we used to be beacon of democracy. Isn't that one of the reasons our parents and grandparents came to this country? We sent our troops to Iraq under many guises, at least one of which was to "liberate" the Iraqui people, who had not at that point shown the kind of rebellious will power necessary to overthrow a dictatorship. The people of Myanmar have been showing that now for over a week. They are ripe for change, willing to die for the democratic right to protest peacefully. Isn't this exactly the kind of country we should help with a military presence? I think so. But we're maxed out financially, our soldiers stretched to the limit fighting for oil in Iraq, inadvertently provoking rebellion against democracy there when we could be providing assistance towards democracy's birth elsewhere--someplace like Myanmar , where the people are hungry for change.

They will stand alone. And we will let them (and democracy) fall again. I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, I think we should. I don't think we should EVER occupy another country under the guise of spreading democracy, which is just a euphemism for empire-building. I think you enter a war when you are being attacked or when your allies are being attacked--otherwise, you're juts a bully. On the other hand, we could at least have sent to Burma peace-keeping troops so that soldiers wouldn't have an opportunity to slaughter peaceful protesters.

Source: Times Online (UK)


Methyl Iodide is this season's Methyl Bromide...I Tomatoes!

If you've been following the results of the Montreal Protocol meetings, you'll know that Methyl Bromide is a naughty chemical that's number one on the list of ozone rippers. So, the Protocol is meant to reduce usage of ozone rippers and methyl bromide is being phased out globally over the next twenty some years. That's great news. Sadly, there are still loopholes through which nations can apply for excemptions and get a quota of methyl bromide to use. Happily, the quotas are reduced more and more each year.

Since US berry and tomato growers want a replacement for methyl bromide, the EPA is set to approve use of (drumroll, please) methyl iodide. Well that just sucks. Not only is methyl iodide linked to increases in cancer and respiratory illnesses, it's also a known neural fucker-upper s (that's when your brain gets chewed up from the inside out and you have trouble staying alive).

The methyl iodide is injected into soil so that it can kill everything and then tomatoes and berries are grown in that same soil. The thinking goes, "since we're not spraying it on the plants themselves, consumers are safe." Oh right, because toxic soil is nothing to worry about. Right. Because when a tomato plant is growing, its roots don't touch the soil, right? Because when a tomato falls to the ground it doesn't fall on soil, right? Because when it rains the rain water doesn't wash the methyl iodide into lakes and streams, right? Cuz rainwater knows better.

Just close your eyes and think of the berries. Sweet juicy berries. And ripe red tomatoes...mmmmm....all better. And take comfort, however small, in the fact that methyl iodide doesn' rip up the ozone layer. Ahhhhhh.


Keep Santa Out!

The North Pole.

The Netherlands wants it. Canada wants it. The USA wants it. The Russians even flagged it.

Oh yeah, by the way, the Inuit already live in that melting part of the world. Inuit don't own tanks or fighter jets. They don't sit on a vast arsenal of nuclear warheads, so....they're resorting to good ol' fashined diplomacy.
"We must develop, for the sake of my people and the world at large, a formal international process focusing on the Arctic that includes indigenous people having meaningful voices," Aqqaluk Lynge, president of the Greenland chapter of the Inuit Circumpolar Council (ICC) told an international gathering of politicians, scientists, and religious figures here earlier this month[...]One of ICC's objectives is to keep the Arctic out of the hands of the military and encourage peaceful uses of the North Pole," says Lynge.

By far the most sensible statement about the North Pole region I've heard. Go Inuit for speaking out! Let's keep democratic oversight alive and make sure our pesky leaders listen.

Full article here.
Source: Christian Science Monitor


Róisín Murphy

Without further ado...Let Me Know, by Róisín Murphy:

I love her, I do. But...I wish she'd consulted with me about that outfit before committing. It's too stifling.

And, did Madonna make it okay for singers to dance badly in their videos? Is it just a white-girl thing? Discuss.

Bush does not play well with others

Well what a surprise. As United Nations' members gather this week to discuss global warming and brainstorm a replacement for the Kyoto Protocol, Bush Baby reaches for his pacifier.

Our American Preemie has decided that he's gonna have his own meeting on Friday and doesn't have time for the UN. Besides that, he's gonna fix climate change his own way, further stripping the US's post WWII reputation as a nation that works with others towards common, benign goals. Didn't we used to uphold that quality as an AMERICAN value? Ah, well, it's the Bush age, and he's the decider and we're all individuals:

“It’s our philosophy that each nation has the sovereign capacity to decide for itself what its own portfolio of policies should be,” said James L. Connaughton, the president’s chief environmental adviser.

It's our philosophy that GLOBAL Warming can be solved by a single spoiled brat and his plentiful corporate tit.

Bush needs a permanent time-out.

Source: The New York Times


Methyl Bromide Milkshakes? Yummy!

Don't you love when it warms just enough in the fall to squeeze in another strawberry milkshake? American-grown strawberries get a nice coating of methyl bromide. Actually, most of the chemical ends is used in the soil where it kills EVERYTHING. Yup. The fields are completely sterilized then agribusiness goes to work planting them full yummy berries. But what's in the soil ends up on the plants, in the plants, on the fruit, in the fruit.

Methyl Bromide is super toxic and shreds the ozone layer. Thankfully, it's being phased out globally via the Montreal Protocol. In Montreal this month delegates from 191 nations met to renew/increase limitations of ozone-ripping chemicals and Methyl Bromide is considered to be the worst culprit. So why oh why isn't this dangerous chemical (it kills EVERYTHING in the soil. EVERYTHING.) closer to being completely wiped out? Mostly it's our fault. Yup. Specifically our love of strawberries.

The USA has applied for exceptions to the rules layed out by previous Montreal Protocols. The statistics are mind-numbing. If you don't read the article, just know this:
"the U.S., which has applied for 6,500 tonnes for 2008 and 5,000 tonnes for 2009, even as the rest of the developed world has dropped significantly to just 1,900 and 1,400 tonnes, respectively."

So, we'll use three times as much methyl bromide because...well...because of this kind of thinking on the part of agribusiness (the quotation is from David McAllister from Chemtura Corporation):
regulatory process already imposes a significant burden on producers, distributors, and users.Critical users have to submit justifications for their critical-use applications, some three years in advance of when that product might be applied, and to substantiate their requests with very extensive documentation. They then must be ready to answer questions about those applications, both from EPA officials and, in some cases, from the international community because of the Montreal Protocol levels.*

Oh, boo hoo Mr. Big Money interest. You gotta deal with red tape so that kids don't drink methyl bromide milkshakes and so that our Argentine pals don't sizzle under the gaping ozone hole. BOO HOO, Chemtura will just have to sell other baby-choking, breast-milk-poisoning chemicals instead. There's just SOOO much paperwork involved in poisoning the planet.

And I KNOW the argument that goes "we gotta protect our industry," but our industry doesn't protect US!! So agribusiness looses money and some jobs are lost because they can't grow as many strawberries without ruining the planet. Oh well. We weren't meant to be growing so many strawberries in the first place. Eat an apple!

*"Critical Use" is the term given to the loopholes created by the Montreal Protocol to allow nations to apply for exemptions to using Methyl Bromide. And this excerpt's from an EPA hearing held earlier this month. You can download the transcript here.


Ripped Seams

The range of human behavior is terrifying. I'd rather be a sloth.

A man in England decided to piss on a dying woman. Oh yes. And not only that, but he put whipped cream on her head. And not only that, but he filmed the entire thing on his cellphone so he could post it on YouTube. He thought it would be funny. It makes you wonder do White kids get a chuckle from hanging nooses off trees?

The Wicked Witch was right, "What a world!"Humanity's seams burst. Are we still people? Still human? Wicked thoughts are human; are wicked deeds?


Happy Babe in Ecstasy

Ooooo to be an infant at a giving tit!
Do you see his head
Cocked to the side and back
Barely sustaining the weight of his glee?
The milky froth trickling from the edge of his lips
(his tongue still lacks mobility
Or else not a drop would be spilled).
Happy babe in ecstasy.

--Carlo Seti


Sally Field

I'm loving Sally right now for her Emmy speech below, uncensored, from a Canadian station. Of course, in America, her last line was censored because, in spite of all the freedoms we claim to possess, we're not allowed to be potty mouths on live TV. GODDAMN GODDAMN GODDAMN!!!! Ahhhh. The internet is for porn and cussing.

And thank God (even though S/He's been damned) for Sally's acute statement. This "war" should never be called such. It's an occupation. Saddam, as much of an asshole as he may have been, did not attack us. WE attacked. WE are the aggressors. This is neo colonialism, and it's putting our country in a financial black hole and for what? Look around in your community--isn't there a better use for that money? Instead, we're spending billions upon billions in exchange for nothing. Think of all the good that money (whether actual hard currency or even in the form of debt) could do in our AMERICAN communities.

Allright. Here's Sally. Praise her.


Ladies and Gentlemen....Disappearing Furries!

What's a Girl To Do by Bat for Lashes

This video from Bat For Lashes gets me in the mood...the mood to fall head over heals for a vampire, the mood to join a group of guerrilla fighters in the amazon, the mood soar over land and sea using my powers of flight as I try to find my true love.

It's evocative, epic, dreamy.


Bush Baby

Last night Bush Baby spoke. I know, it's such a treat, right? Not! The speech is here if you can stomach it. What's really fun about it is the storytelling. You wall wanted him to pull out of Iraq, well he's pulling out SOME troops all the while he's SPINNING the reduction in forces, claiming the reason for it is due to his, er, I mean, America's success in Iraq. His hand must be tired from patting his own back so hard. poor Bush Baby, it's hard work being President.

My ultra favorite quotation from the speech is:
The principle guiding my decisions on troop levels in Iraq is return on success. The more successful we are, the more American troops can return home

I mean, shit, the more AMC theatres I visit the more points I get on my AMC MovieWatcher card, the more free popcorn I get. Buy into the war and the war will be over more quickly, people. Work hard, soldiers, and you can accumulate enough frequent flyer miles to get out of Iraq.

Ugh, you know, I seem to remember taking a really large dump in 1999, and I thought I flushed it all down the toilet but it seems the turd escaped and went on to become president.

Here are more lovely excertpts to discuss:

In Iraq, an ally of the United States is fighting for its survival. Terrorists and extremists who are at war with us around the world are seeking to topple Iraq's government, dominate the region and attack us here at home. If Iraq's young democracy can turn back these enemies, it will mean a more hopeful Middle East and a more secure America.

Remember how when America was a young democracy, the gangs of Boston used to blow up the gangs of West Virginia, and the Meninites used to decapitate the Baptists over in the Midwest? Remember?

To call Iraq a young democracy is at once condescending and delusional.

And finally:
our success in meeting [our] objectives now allows us to begin bringing some of our troops home.

The positive side to all this? He's on the defensive, big time. Unfortunately it's becoming more and more apparent that we'll be in Iraq through the end of his terms in office.


Attention Mesdames et Messieurs Furries

Eef you are a low-verrr of zee fuzzy animalz, zen zees eez for you. EuroDisney, je t'adore. And I want to buy a condom shaped like zee Donald Duck--zee conduck. Amen.


Quotable of the Day

Going into Brooklyn this weekend on the E train:

Dufus One: Yeah I was putting gel in my dad's hair and he's all 'I've never done this before' and I'm like 'chill out dad you'll look cool.' Then when I was finished he's like 'I don't look GAY do I?'

Dufus Two: That's funny.

I turned to Rey and wondered, we don't even own any hair gel, do we? Maybe conservative christians and their coalitions get all worried that the world's gone gay because they see all these men with hair gel and think that's a gay, there's another, Joey Lawrence is a gay, Bob Sagat's a gay, all the weathermen in all the country are gays, and the greasers in Grease are gay----agggghhhhhh! They're shoving their hair products in our face! No little Timmy, that Dep will be the end of you, get out of the shampoo aisle!

For the record, the image above is of Totally Hair Ken--a version of the doll from the early 1990's. Purple pants and Dep are definitely more gay than sucking cock, Timmy.


GIft of Sight

The present is more frightening than the future. Mama's got the sight. She knows what we can only suspect.

Over labor day weekend mama came up from Miami for a brief stay. It takes hardly any time at all to get a glimpse of the fiery chasm in her mind.

Mama believes NASA's shuttle missions are ripping holes in the ozone layer. Perhaps. What's certain is their pollution can't possibly help our wobbly existence.

The real insight, though: mama's suspicious of benign-ness of space missions. "Every time a shuttle flies up, there are earthquakes all around."

Throw plate tectonics out the porthole; flying to space is making the earth shake!

In honor of mama, AIR made a PSA: Surfing on a Rocket.

Rage Against the Space Machines, fellow readers!!!!!



She was a supermom, unaffected by the microbial war propaganda urging all to disinfect to the point of self-annihilation. Her daughter's pacifier fell to the floor of the E train.

"Mommy, my blue," she begged for the sky-colored rubber sucker.

"Where'd it go?"

And toddlerette looked to the ground. Momma picked it up, sucked it clean and stuck it back between baby's lips.

Piss, beer, vomit, mud, slush, orange juice, spit--just some of what I've seen glazing subway floors.

I tell you, this momma's got a death mouth. She's a gila monster, growing poison algae in her spit, ready to bite to kill--her saliva will infect your blood--BEWARE!

My Daemon

A few weeks ago I went on the Golden Compass' movie site and found out my daemon was a Peacock (shoulda been a peahen since daemons are the opposite gender as their humans, but whatever). I answered the questionnaire again, though, and now I'm a fox. Check it out and if you answer 5 questions below you can find out if you agree with the daemon I've been assigned.